Tuesday, December 07, 2010
Being a huge (some might say unhealthily obsessed) fan of Christmas, this year I decided during a particularly boring stretch of office-time to make a list of many of the Christmas-related films I could think of and rank them, bracket-style. I confess I was spurred into action by an article on Newslite that listed Home Alone as the best Christmas family film, a mediocre slice of hack entertainment atop a pathetic shit-stain of a list populated by such oddities as Mary Poppins and, to my utter bafflement, Back to the Future. Please don't rewatch BttF in the hopes of reminding yourself where in there the characters celebrate Christmas. They don't. None of the three films in the series features anything even remotely Christmas-related.
Anyway, I figured I could do better. Click it to get a bigger and more legible version.
After I came up with the list, I made the bracket. Most of these titles were randomly seeded, although I shuffled a few around when it made sense. I'm not sure my results were entirely successful, and I bet if I'd put this together at a different time of day I could come up with totally different results. Another film could've just as easily won! But not Fred Claus. It's a piece of shit.
Here's a blank bracket if you want to try it yourself.
I realize my pick of It's A Wonderful Life over A Christmas Story in the controversial semi-finals may offend some people's sense of decency and correctness in the universe. It was a difficult choice, one I agonized over for several moments, but I stand behind it. And if you tilt your head 90 degrees to the right, the bracket looks like a tree shape! Isn't that fascinating? It isn't? I tried. Ho ho ho.